The Exorcist Still

Somebody in your family acting kinda… Strange? Like say, spinning her head round and around? A dear friend suddenly acting like another person… such as Satan? Neighbor performing unnatural acts? I mean REALLY unnatural acts… like floating in the living room or developing boils when sprinkled with Holy Water?

So you think that maybe you need the services of an exorcist… Well, here’s what to do: Hightail it immediately to a Roman Catholic church and ask to see the priest. When you see the priest, instantly make it as clear as a country stream that you are in desperate need of spiritual advice and you want to speak to him in his role as a priest. This way, under law in most every municipality, the priest cannot divulge the details of your conversation. Then calmly and reasonably tell the priest that you believe that you need a priest to perform the Holy Rite of Exorcism. Even though the RC church will try to talk you out of it be firm. Insist that you speak to the Parish Priest, then his superior, then the Cardinal and the Archbishop if you have to. Keep reminding them that Exorcism is a Holy Rite – a Blessed Sacrament of the Church – and that anointing the sick is also one of the RC Church’s Holy Sacraments. Tell him you need him to visit a sick person. That is not lying, and it will at least get a clergy member into the room with the afflicted person. The RC Church has Exorcists in all parts of the country and the world. But like any well-structured corporation, the RC church has many people shielding the specialist from the public. It takes patience, but after a while the case will get passed along to the exorcist.

(NB: I have been advised that Jewish folk seeking advice about demonic possession should go to a Chassidic Rebbe.)


The answer is simple: because the world is full of people more than willing to perform a “magick ceremony” which they will describe as an ancient secret to separate the afflicted from the demon inside him. In reality, they will be more interested in separating you from your money. If word gets out about your sad situation, you will make yourself ripe for the picking by every phony mystic. If anybody asks you to pony up cash for “treatments” get far away from that person.

So why go to the RC Church? For the same reason that you go to the fire department if a fire breaks out, or that you go to the police if your house is robbed, or call the Sanitation department if snow blocks the roads. Each department has many highly trained experts who offer their skills and services free of charge. That’s what the RC church does. They are the undisputed Experts of Exorcism. They have been doing this work for over 2,000 years and they do the work for no money. Don’t fall victim to hustlers who offer to help you… for a price. You know something? You should not even have clicked the link to get to this page. You don’t really know me. I could have been a crook just waiting to get my hooks into you. Well, I will help you and help you for nothing: Go see a RC priest! NOW! I would no more perform an Exorcism for you than I would give you a heart bypass; and messing up a bypass operation would probably cause you fewer problems than a botched exorcism would. I KNOW evil. I have seen and heard evil. So get to that Church and get help there. When it comes to exorcism, they are the master surgeons.

Good luck and Godspeed.

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